Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: “The Pan-Dammit” Pandemic (Snarky Humor)🀦🌴

I lost my cherub-like demeanor today. It crept up slowly. I went to one of my favorite bookstores/nerdy stores today. I had been looking forward to it all day, as they recently reopened (partially). Shortly upon entering, I was told “May I help you find anything? We’re closing in ten minutes.” I smiled politely (pointless behind my mask) and said “No thank you” and proceeded to find the saint to leave. Then another worker came up to me:

“WE’RE CLOSING IN FIVE MINUTES. GET YOUR CRAP AND GET OUT, YOU LITTLE PUNK!!”

Ahem. I exaggerate a little, but that’s how the message filtered into my brain. Sniff.

Continue reading “Author: “The Pan-Dammit” Pandemic (Snarky Humor)🀦🌴”

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: Peregrine’s Arc Hits 300 Followers, Book Sale & New Book UpdateπŸ¦‰

A big thank you to everyone who has followed my blog. I’ve been noticing the blog growing over the past few weeks and wanted to make sure to stop and thank my new followers. Welcome! 😊

If anyone needs a book to read during the pandemic, please check out my book at Amazon. In celebration of the blog’s growth (and because money can be a little tight for some people right now), my book is on sale for $9 hard copy and $3.99 for ebook.* If you have Kindle Unlimited, it’s free. If you want to read it but can’t order right now, ask an obliging librarian to order a copy for you when you’re allowed to return to the library. It’s the wonderful magic of public libraries and they can add it to their circulation. 😊

Book update: GOTD** is coming along…better. I’ve had a harder time getting to know my protagonist with this book. She’s a bit shy, but her name is Blaire and she’s much younger than Memory Bound’s protagonist. She has a quiet voice, but I think I’m listening better. That’s what we writers do, right? We listen to the story already being told. Or something like that.

GOTD is another horror novel, but good horror. Good horror, as I’ve written about on this blog, is hard to find. It’s an art to scare people, to reveal true monsters instead of falling back on cheap scares, grungy writing or stale entertainment tactics. I learned a lot from writing Memory Bound. I’m taking my time writing GOTD, but hope to have my first draft written by the end of summer. The saint is gently holding me to this deadline. How is your writing going?

Cheers, everyone. And happy writing. Ker-kaw! ✏️

*I just adjusted the prices on Amazon and it can take up to 72 hours to show up. If the prices look higher than what I listed above, try coming back later once Amazon approves my changes. πŸ˜ŠπŸ‘

**I give out my book titles in acronyms before they’re published. MB was Memory Bound.

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: Grocery Shopping During a Pandemic πŸš” πŸ§ΎπŸ’Έ

Before I tell you this story, to quote the comedian Mike Birbiglia: “Remember, you’re on my side.”

Continue reading “Author: Grocery Shopping During a Pandemic πŸš” πŸ§ΎπŸ’Έ”

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: How Are You & New job Storytime (Humor)πŸš—πŸ§­

I started my new job this past week. Yes, you read that right: I started a new job in the middle of a pandemic. I fought with my GPS, driving here, driving there, to try to get myself set up as a a new employee. On Day Three, Google led me directly past where I needed to go, right into a road that I wasn’t technically allowed to enter. That was fun to explain, right before I was forced to do a U-turn, pass Go and forgo collecting my $200.

On Day Four, Google told me to go straight at a gate that was closed and barricaded. Google clearly insisted on this, and then I believe brought me to a second gate that was also closed and barricaded. I drove around on private property, trying to force the GPS to reroute and recalculate itself to give me Option B. During this time, I was praying fervently that I would make it to my appointment on time and hoping a curious cop wouldn’t find me and pull me over.Β 

I finally ended up doing a huge circle, on and off the highway, and got back to where I started. My GPS then repeated the same directions that got me into my predicament in the first place

“Take a left at Sesame Street,” Google chirped from my phone. “Sunny days. Everything is, A-Okay!..”🎢

“SHUT UP, GOOGLE!!!”

Let’s just say, my GPS and I are not talking at the moment.

Continue reading “Author: How Are You & New job Storytime (Humor)πŸš—πŸ§­”

Brief Humor & Check-Ins, Christianity: My Journey & Thoughts, YouTube Shares

Author: Saying “Bye” and New Adventures πŸ§­

In my personal life, I am starting a new chapter. I am beginning a new job next month after some much needed rest and some self care. It’s quite a change in the grand scheme of things for this little millennial girl, but I am up for the challenge and adventure. I go with God; I go with grace. He is walking with me.

My word of the year isΒ fortitude. I’ve been carrying it around with me, next to my mint tea bags, Pokeballs and chapstick. It’s been difficult saying goodbye to people at work. But I’m remembering I’m saying hello to others.

I included a few songs that have been sticking with me lately. The first video has an epilepsy warning at the beginning so please enjoy the other two if that’s you.

And just to be clear, I’m still writing and doing this blog. Happy writing! 😊✏️

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: Retail Therapy (25 Books on Clearance/Sale)πŸ“šπŸ“š

Oh, the clearance sections of used book stores are certainly magical places. I’ve found many an excellent story hidden among the stacks of forgotten lore. There was even a sale today on top of the clearance prices. Oh, joy. Oh, rapture.

And in case anyone’s counting, one book (Building Blocks) was hidden accidentally when I took the photo. Happy reading.

KIMG0517

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: The VERY Weird Week of Weeks πŸ³οΈ

I can’t share everything, but let’s just dive into the deep end, shall we? Don’t run off now…We’re just getting started!

  • I nearly got knocked out (and I mean one-two, you’re out!) by my dog (accidentally). She was excited to see me and she was excited for her dinner–all at the same time. It was too much happiness for her to contain and process. Silly me, I knelt down to pet her and she knocked her skull against my lower jaw–hard–in her sheer and utter ecstasy. Now I know what a boxer must feel like. πŸ₯Š
  • I made a lady mad at me for my chip not working in my debit card at her register, even though their new machines weren’t working right. That was pleasant, along with her begging me (her hands were pressed together like she was praying) to look into my card’s issues. Ahem. Usually a machine will have you swipe after awhile if it can’t read your chip and all is well. Oh, no. Let’s give the blue screen of death instead and blame the customer. Cheers.
  • I got to watch someone take their driver’s test in the parking garage the other day. I’m only half kidding. I watched as someone backed up a few times in front of three waiting cars to wiggle the butt of their car into position. And then, by golly, they went for it! They went into reverse (yes, reverse; did I stutter?) into an angled parking space. I promise you, if you keep going up there are indeed more magical rectangle spaces for your fine steed. Come with me if you want to park!
  • I received a slightly panicked phonecall requesting immediate assistance, along with a half hearted warning that I may not want to come after all. That was fun. Yes, yes: everyone calm down. I’m on the case. I think.
  • My key kept getting stuck in my car’s ignition. After awhile, I think my car was trying to tell me something: “Don’t go out there, mother. It’s not worth it!” How right he is.

How about you, how was your week? Leave a thought below and hit that follow button if you want to join this crazy thing called Peregrine Arc. Ker-kaw and sakes alive, she even writes books! ✏️

Cheers.

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: Overheard in the Peregrine Household (Quick Humor) πŸ€­

The joys of stomach viruses, folks. Enjoy. ✏️

The Saint: “But I wanted to finish painting my room tomorrow…”

Me: “Do you think it’s a good idea to be in a room with the windows open in December when you’re sick? I don’t want you running to the bathroom like it’s your last life in Mario either.”

Ba dum, cchsssh. πŸ₯

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Author: Happy Thanksgiving & Thank You πŸ¦ƒβœοΈ

A belated Happy Thanksgiving to everyone and a brief note of thanks. I’m very thankful to all the writers I’ve met on here and continue to get to know. We’re all on our journeys and it’s nice to see the encouragement and support we give each other in our little corners of the internet.

Thank you as well to my followers and to those who have read my scribbles, whether on here or in my book. I hope you’ll continue to share your scribbles, too. If you want to become part of the Arcian crew, just hit that follow button; we’ll be glad to have you.

So write on and enjoy your Thanksgiving leftovers. Pass the cranberries, wouldn’t you? Kia kaha!