Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Silly Tales & Incidentals, Dah’ling: A Tale

  1. Left a candle burning. Overnight. Lived to tell the tale.
  2. Put the kettle on the stove to boil. Promptly forgot about said kettle. Once saintly husband found it, half the water had been boiled out.
  3. Smacked face into tree limb while on riding lawnmower.
  4. Had to explain to dentist at my appointment that the “tree limb incident” was perhaps the reason why I was having a little bleeding in my mouth. (Turns out I had probably brushed too hard. What can I say–dental hygiene for the win.)
  5. Did a crazy dance of “Get away from me, you murderous villain” whilst swinging my hat around in a parking lot as a huge bug divebombed me. Looked over at the car parked next to ours–definitely was occupied with a man, whom I’m sure enjoyed my impromptu ninja dance.
  6. Perfected my ninja dance of protection on second return to said store parking lot, using my hat as a swinging pendulum device while moving in a straight line, shuffling paranoidly to our vehicle. Science for the win.
  7. Ducked the low hanging tree branches successfully at the next time mowing to avoid getting hit in the face. Lost my hat this time instead to one particularly vindictive tree branch. Promised myself I would retrieve my hat after finishing my chore. Promptly forgot any such thing, leaving it to survive a night of terror in the wild yonder–alone, abandoned and forgotten. Neighbors pointed out my hat to my husband the next evening. Got said hat back. The hat and I may be attending counseling together.
  8. Was doing a landscaping project, and my shovel hit an area where it consistently just would not go through. Rock, I hear you say? Hard clay, yet another? It got personal quickly; the shovel and I had words. I told my shovel that it wasn’t very sharp; it said I was an empty toolshed with no bolts to spare. Turns out, there was a weed blocker fabric that had grass camouflaging it; the border of the bed had originally been farther out into the yard and had been overgrown. Well played, spade. Well played.

Just eight silly (and slightly foolish) things I’ve done lately. Hope you had a good laugh, or at least a smile or two. Leave your funnies in the comments and happy writing.

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