Brief Humor & Check-Ins, Christianity: My Journey & Thoughts

Indie Author: When You Want To Kill Someone (humor)

To quote John Pinette, sometimes I lose my cherub like demeanor. Whether it’s in parking garages, the daily commute or someone being a me-monster, my clock of patience winds down with humanity more quickly these days. The hour hand suddenly jams and can’t move. Soon the second hand gets stuck and the minute hand ticks solitarily in place. I start to twitch while calculating coffin sizes in my mind.

Why, you think to yourself, are humans so selfish? I checked out a few theology books* at the library the other day, as we INTJ Christians do, to review the apologetics. One of the books answers tough questions about life, like why evil exists and why paper cuts happen. The Archangel Gabriel tapped me on the shoulder while I was checking out. I saw he had some comic books in his hands: X-Men Archangel of all things. He was frank with me, as usual: “Try dealing with your kind for thousands of years, kid. Some of us angels are difficult, too, but that’s a whole other story. By the way, can you autograph my copy of Memory Bound? Make it out to “Gabby the Angel”. Michael will keep his paws off it that way…”

Sometimes, for a brief moment, I think I understand just a little of the wrath of God. There are moments where I want to hurl a thunder bolt at the idiots who run red lights and almost kill other drivers. It’s such a reckless disregard for human life and I see it weekly. Or I want to sew the mouth shut of the co-worker who knows nothing but malicious, juicy gossip and treats slander like bubblegum that loses its flavor too fast. And I’d really like to hand out belts. People could pull their pants up then and I could avoid seeing Tommy Hilfiger’s latest line.

Do you ever get frustrated by humanity? How do you react, outside of physical violence and measuring shoulders for coffins? Let us know in the comments below. Until then, fly in and keep writing, Arcians. Ker-kaw!

*This is one book I checked out and here’s another.

10 thoughts on “Indie Author: When You Want To Kill Someone (humor)”

  1. How your post corresponded to my mood today is just scary. And yes, sometimes feel like shouting at other humans “why are you such idiots!” too. But I know that even if I vent out my frustration at them and explain possibly why they’re wrong, they still insist they’re right. So, I just keep my silence and let out my negative emotions through writing.

    I love this post by the way. Ker-kaw!

    1. Thank you and thanks for returning the ker-kaw. 😁 You’re one of the first. Cheers!

      And yes, I agree. I’m learning how to express my frustrations but it ends up better when I write about them instead.

  2. Oh, I really enjoyed this!! So many things have happened and I get frustrated with people! But I settle for writing about these situations, gives me a good laugh that way too! And ker-kaw!

  3. I know this feeling all too well! As a teacher, I witness the cruel and vindictive things that students can and, unfortunately, will do to one another without a second thought. I want to grab them and shake them and make them see the errors of their ways. Don’t they understand their actions have consequences? That their words may leave emotional scars for years?

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