Ponderings, Stopping By...

Author: Eating the Sucker (Gyno Visit |Humor) 🍭

Every year when I visit my lovely gynocologist to do my health (fit as a fiddle), wealth (take my money) and stealth (ninja power level 9000) check, I usually do the same things:

  1. I forget how to get to the office. I remember on the way there.
  2. Once arriving, I try going through the same locked door. I walk down three feet and find an unlocked door. The mysteries of building security.
  3. I see at least one child being mischievous. It was two this time. They were both wearing surgical masks and a newspaper was suspiciously crumpled near them on a chair.
  4. The waiting room has at least one baby, usually more, and a few nervous and bored fathers. I suspect the nervous fathers are first time dads and the bored ones have been through the process a time or two.
  5. I ask the health tech if I can use the restroom like I’m back at school and am expecting to be told no and asked to finish my homework first.
  6. I eat a sucker at the checkout desk after everything is done. Why? Because I forget how old I am. And the check out secretary just smiles and hands me my paperwork. Peace, lady. ☮️
  7. I miss my turn on the way out to get back to the main road. Every. Single. Time.

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Stopping By...

Author: Oh, The Throes of Summer

Summer has camped out at the Peregrine household, making herself quite at ease, all 90+ degrees of herself. I slip the Labrador ice cubes and frozen bananas to cool her down as the Saint and I break out the fans and water jugs. Summer flits her radiant, sun bleached hair and twitters about, remarking about the rising level of humidity and how much she enjoys melting things…

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