Christianity: My Journey & Thoughts, Ponderings

Reflections & Thoughts: Heaven, Hell and Which Tune to March To

I’ve never been a morning person–those who wake up with the sunrise and delight in singing chirpy, Julie Andrew tunes. I shuffle like a Resident Evil extra arriving late to set, put my shirt on backwards, and make my guardian angel file their retirement paperwork (yet again) as I navigate the stairs to find my way down to the kitchen. The law of gravity–such a pesky thing to watch out for.

How does one become a disciplined person? This is a journey I’ve been (lost and wandering) on for several years now. The saint often comments I’m one of the most disciplined persons he knows; however, I believe I can improve. And I want to. To stop growing is to become rootbound, and I wish to flourish.

A large swath of American society does not appear to appreciate quiet, introspective intelligent people–I’ll go further and add women to that descriptive, although I’m sure other genders experience this, too. Gentleness and meekness are seen as weaknesses, not strengths. Reflection and stillness are seen as adversaries to worshipping capitalism. “Return to work!” the conservatives cry to those not returning to the workforce. What they mean is “You’re worthless if you don’t become a slave for our kingdom.” This is one of their many lies.

I become very fatigued from listening to this, and similar verbiage from some conservative Americans–particularly those falsely calling themselves Christians. These chaos worshippers wave their banners of hypocrisy and eagerly run to support Trump and his growing bandwagon at the pulpit of the damned. These stirrings, and those who are zealous to join, are frightening. This is not of Christ; can you guess who it is from? I often comment to my husband that the last several years of recent history is like the separating of the sheep from the goats–people’s hearts are being revealed, and the sight is ugly and it is revolting.

I often wonder what Jesus would do, if he would return right at this moment. I think he would be incredibly furious, particularly at those who have the most power and resources and who used them for evil–especially evil done in his Father’s name. The Vatican, I believe, is extremely guilty of this and continues to blindly march into Hell–a theme I sometimes circle in my writing. If the old prophets returned today, what would they say? What would their faces look like? Only a perfect God can judge perfectly–but I feel many Christians have lost any fear (or love) of God.

I once saw a video of a woman, holding her baby, crawling on her knees across a courtyard outside of a church, crying out to God for mercy. I don’t know what her situation was, or what she was asking God for; I’m not sure it matters. Her humility and her rawness were apparent–it was not an act, as I’m not even sure she was aware of being filmed or photographed. The moment was her and Yahweh–herself and her God–coming together in honesty, truth and love.

“I have done wrong,” her face seemed to say. “Forgive me. Forgive me, and do not abandon me.”

As I work on becoming more disciplined, I think about such things, like software gently humming in the background of my mind. What tune do I choose to march to? Do I surrender myself daily to God, and ask Him for discernment and guidance–or do I allow myself to march to the easier tune of Hell, as I watch so many others march to the pied piper of propaganda and deliberate lies? Of control and ultimately death?

It’s a daily check; a discipline developed over time; a humility and wisdom I want and repeatedly ask for.

“Do not swerve to the right or to the left; keep your foot from evil.”

Amen, I say. Amen–let it be so.

Blogmas 2019, Writing: I've Got Gadgets and Gizmos a Plenty...

Blogmas 2019: Days 13 – 15 (My Writing Room) 🧟‍♀️

I have a statue of a witch that I keep in a corner of my writing room. She was the last statue in a display of marked down Halloween items I found earlier this year. I thought she was well designed in her black and glittering robes and her tall, pointy sloped hat. Her features were gnarled and realistic. Love at first sight.

Over time, however, she actually began to scare me. It was usually when I had just finished reading a good ghost story or I began hearing the creaks of our house that sound like footsteps. Overactive writer’s imagination, you know.

I started to picture her appearing next to me while I was on my bike with my back turned to her, or creeping up to me while I was working at my desk and she was in my periphery. I began considering putting her in storage until Halloween, or until the year 2080. But then I realized something. I write horror, don’t I? Perhaps I need something that scares me a little in my writing room…

Continue reading “Blogmas 2019: Days 13 – 15 (My Writing Room) 🧟‍♀️”

Reposts/Reblog Shares

Reblog Share: Chelsea’s “A Pregnancy Poem” (Motherhood Blog)


Check out Chelsea’s other blog, Arcians, all about the adventures of raising tiny humans and navigating that thing called motherhood. Cheers. ☺️🍼

I Didn't Want to Be a Mother

Sitting in the kitchen,
Wond’ring at the food;
Knowing I should eat some
But I’m just not in the mood.

Later, in the bathroom,
Staring at my mien;
Looking for The Pregnant Glow
But only seeing sheen.

Somehow I daily make it,
Through a nause’us haze
Knowing that it’s not that bad
And there’re only 182 more days…


Photo Credit:

©2019 Chelsea Owens

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