Blogmas 2019, Labrador Lessons

Blogmas: The Joys of Labradors (Humor |Day 16)🐾

We have a Labrador Retriever mix. She was heartworm positive when she was rescued and she’s been free of heartworm and healthy ever since. Three cheers!

Here are a few funny thoughts about our dog that have come up over the years. See if you can relate to any.

  1. My Labrador believes she is a lap dog. My dog weighs around 52lbs and likes to sit on top of me, while I’m sitting in a chair. Her butt usually ends up right around my neck. Yes, dear dog of mine, I’m not going anywhere. Wouldn’t dream of it.
  2. Labs love to eat. I once had a vet tech suggest to me that if my dog was still hungry after her meals, to simply mix frozen vegetables into her dog food. My response? “She’s a Lab; she’s always hungry.” If I left her dog food canister open, I’d come home to a very happy walrus.
  3. I asked my dog recently: “What would you do if you had opposable thumbs?” Her answer: “Open the refrigerator door, of course.”
  4. Lastly, I like to check in with my dog. See if she feels loved, safe and well taken care of. Her critique? “More num nums, less baths. Keep congratulating me after I go poo; it’s a big deal to me. And let me roll around in dead things more often. It’s a treat you humans just simply don’t understand.”

And there you have it. I plan to catch up on my cycling today and tomorrow. I’ll try to post a picture of the timer later.

See you tomorrow for Day 17! 🚴‍♀️

Brief Humor & Check-Ins, Labrador Lessons

Author: Method #491 of Calming the Labrador (Sing Elvis)

Our dog (who, by chance, is the inspiration for a character in my book) greatly dislikes thunderstorms. It could be just heat lightning; it could be only remnants of thunder. If it’s both, it’s all over. Let the shaking, pacing, panting and anxiety begin.

Thundercoats only take the edge off for the Labrador; treats and toys are but momentary distractions. One boom-boom and we’re off to bury ourselves behind the couch cushions.

But recently, I had a breakthrough. And it’s Elvis. I began to sing “Can’t Help Falling in Love With You” to the Lab, and then played the song while singing. After about fifteen renditions, I had a calm dog ready to go sleep. The storm was also done by then, but the singing helped her to stay by me during the storm. Instead of pacing, she sat by me and eventually laid down. Her panting and anxiety decreased, too. I call that a win.

So here you go. Let me know if this works for you the next time your animal kingdom companion builds up anxiety. The king would be proud. 🎤

Our lab, looking majestic. Thanks for reading.
Labrador Lessons

Labrador Lessons III: Pace Thyself, Human! (Our First 10k)

There are gulpers and there are chippers in this world. I am a gulper. There are no stages, no stepping stones of graduated achievements with how I proceed. There is simply the goal and myself, whatever it may be. Everything between me and the goal must be overcome. And now, today, this very instant in fact! Definitely not tomorrow or a wishy-washy “sometime later, honey.” I will stay the course, finish strong, even if doctors and nurses hurry behind me with a crash cart and tranquilizer darts. Reality be darned!

All this I thought today during my first 10k, walking at a steady pace with my saintly husband* and tolerant Labrador. And then my Lab, during mile six, laid down in the middle of the road during a water break. She peered up at me and my so-called goals.

“Go ahead–try to move me, human,” my Labrador taunted me from the ground. “But you’re going to carry my 55lb butt back to the air conditioned car. And then I’m gonna pee all over your azaleas you just planted so lovingly…”

Continue reading “Labrador Lessons III: Pace Thyself, Human! (Our First 10k)”