Brief Humor & Check-Ins, Short Stories & Poetry

Author: A Time of Kerfluffles (Bad Poetry / Humorous Happenings) 🌠

Based on true events….

A Time of Kerfluffles

Two weeks ago, my eyeglasses broke. The pin popped out and the tech’s head just shook. “Too bad, you’re out of luck; you’re a blind, little bat now you idle schmuck. And don’t stumble on the welcome mat on the way out, you putz!”

My finger, shortly thereafter, broke in two; would I ever lie to you? Oh well, it’s just a strain, but I do have people sign my little splint just the same.

And then last Tuesday, I recall still yet with dread: I stepped on a rusty nail head! No scratches, no impailments, no ER trips or sky rocket payments. Tetanus shot is up to date and my guardian angel is going on vacation, post haste.

And then yesterday, or was it two days ago hence? I broke my car’s side mirror, to my garage’s horror and my proceeding recompense. Seven years of bad luck is mine from parking a smidgen too close inside.

No worries and have no fear. Because, even if this superstition is true, it’ll be over so very soon. At my current rate, I’ll be free of this bad luck around, well…let’s calculate and see. Why the year six thousand, four hundred and ninety three!

Reposts/Reblog Shares

The Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest

 

Come all, come one. Can you write the most terrible poem to the theme?

Chelsea Ann Owens

Welcome to The Weekly Terrible Poetry Contest! This is our 34th time of offending the internet and I hope we continue to disappoint.

As those who’ve entered before know, writing terrible poetry is an art form. To truly offend one’s sensibilities; a bad poet needs to nearly fit a meter, almost follow a rhythmic pattern, or get so close to a beautiful description his audience starts picturing EXIT signs instead of snow falling gently in a springtime field. I explain the process a bit here.

Besides that, here are this week’s specifics:

  1. Topic: Animals and their pregnancy.
    Did you know the African Bush Elephant carries …well, an elephant for 22 months? That a male seahorse carries the babies (up to 1,500!)? Or that female Komodo Dragons can impregnate themselves without a male through a process called parthenogenesis?
    Did you know you’re going to write a poem about it?

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Contest Entries

Terrible Poetry Contest Entry: Entropy

Hey, you there. Yes, you. Go to Chelsea’s page and submit your own Terrible Poem take on Unusual Ways to Make Money. Read the rules, mind the PG rating and dive in. We need fresh blood of the terrible kind.

My entry is below. I took a different turn with this one. Crack on.
Continue reading “Terrible Poetry Contest Entry: Entropy”

Contest Entries

Terrible Poetry Contest Winner: Oi’, Summah!

Lightning has hit twice. I have won the Terrible Poetry Contest for the second glorious time. And everyone rejoiced and roasted Oxford commas over cozy bonfires.

Want to join in on the terribleness? The new contest opens tomorrow. Check out Chelsea’s page for details.

Crack on.

Continue reading “Terrible Poetry Contest Winner: Oi’, Summah!”

Fellow Authors, Reposts/Reblog Shares

#ShareAReviewDay Tuesday – Devil in the Wind by Frank Prem

 

Check it out, Arcians and consider supporting a fellow author. I realized after reading Devil in the Wind’s blurb that 1.) It sounds very interesting and 2.) I know next to nothing about Australia. Thus I need to read and learn about these bush fires of 2009.

I pre-ordered my copy. Check out the links for more information. I’m adding this eagerly to my summer reading stack. ☺️📚📚📚

The Write Stuff

Hi, Folks! It’s #ShareAReviewDay Tuesday again, and our guest this morning is Frank Prem. Frank is sharing a review from his poetic anthology, Devil in the Wind. After reading this, I’m sold. I’ve pre-ordered this one to add to my collection of poetry anthologies, and I suspect many of you will as well. Thanks for checking it out today, and for sharing far and wide, as well. 

REVIEW:

Mick rated Devil In The Wind5.0 out of 5 stars on Goodreads
https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/44440062-devil-in-the-wind

Like Frank’s previous book, Small Town Kid, this collection of poems tells a story of rural and small town Australia. But the similarities between the two books end there.

Whereas the previous collection was a celebration of boyhood in Frank’s hometown, this is an account of the dreadful bushfires of February 2009 that swept through parts of Southern Australia, the area that is home to the author…

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Christianity: My Journey & Thoughts, Thoughts & Reviews

Author: Serpents & Doves

There are moments in life where we need to make quick decisions. These are forks in the roads with possible cliffs. Do I raise my voice and lose control to anger? Do I snap back and give a biting, scathing remark? Do I judge someone harshly walking by me? Do I fall back on legalism?

I’m reminded of a quote, one that I put in my book. This verse has stuck with me for a long time. I find it very uncanny:

“I am sending you out like sheep among wolves. Therefore be as shrewd as snakes and as innocent as doves.” -Jesus (Matthew 10:16)

Continue reading “Author: Serpents & Doves”

Brief Humor & Check-Ins

Indie Author Updates: I Give You Poe (You’re Welcome)

In America, we’re in a government shutdown–the longest we’ve experienced in our young nation’s history. With paychecks halted, FBI workers are lining up next to White House employees to get food distributions at Food Banks. Somebody pinch me. Surely this is fake news, right? No, you insist, it’s not? Well then. Double irony for $600, Alex, and pass the potatoes. This sure is a surreal way to bring in 2019. And sad.

Continue reading “Indie Author Updates: I Give You Poe (You’re Welcome)”

Contest Entries

Terrible Poetry Contest Entry: “Terrible Managers”

This week’s theme is Terrible Managers. Join the fun at Chelsea Ann’s webpage and remember–the poem is supposed to be terrible. She’s serious about that and I’m actually trying to get worse.

My entry is below. Huzzah!

Continue reading “Terrible Poetry Contest Entry: “Terrible Managers””